My dear A—I feel quite sorry to have been so long without 
    writing to you—but many things in mind and body have seemed a hindrance, so 
    you must excuse it, and not think yours was uninteresting—it is far 
    otherwise. To hear the faintest sigh after heart-acquaintance with Jesus is 
    always deeply interesting to me, and surely it is such "smoking flax" He 
    will not quench, and such "bruised reeds" He will not break. He is a tender 
    Shepherd; He knows the lambs cannot travel very fast, so He will sometimes 
    gather them in His arms, and carry them in His bosom; while, at others, He 
    will allow even those little ones to feel the roughness of the road and 
    their own weakness, that they may be emptied of self-confidence, and walk 
    humbly, confiding in the Lord alone. All Divine leadings are in Divine 
    sovereignty, and we cannot mark out any specific line, either for ourselves 
    or others. But this we know, that all who are born of God shall be led and 
    taught by the Spirit, and all such do feel sin hateful and holiness 
    desirable. They hunger and thirst after righteousness—Christ and His 
    manifested pardon is the object, either of their desire or of their 
    enjoyment. To understand the Holy Scripture, and to find a blessing in 
    ordinances, they also seek after, longing at the same time to realize, 
    communion with God and with His saints; such desires are proofs of spiritual 
    life, and where there is life there shall be growth, although, as I 
    before said, the way and manner thereof is sovereign. Some learn war in 
    their youth, and have all their enemies coming out against them, when as yet 
    they scarcely know under whose banner they are fighting. This was my own 
    case; and, though it seemed very hard, I now bless God for it, fully proving 
    that "it is good to bear the yoke in one's youth." We must learn to fight, 
    if we are of the living family, and those who sing and make merry in early 
    days are often very uneasy when the trumpet calls them from the banquet to 
    the battle; and when, after the green pastures, they have to follow their 
    Lord "in a land not sown." However, all His ways are right ways, and in the 
    end each will say, "He has done all things well" (Psalm. 107:7). They shall 
    all prove that "the end of a thing is better than the beginning." Balaam 
    might well say, "Let me die the death of the righteous, and let my last end 
    be like his;" but, alas! he had never been led forth in the right way—by the 
    footsteps of the flock; he did not hunger and thirst after righteousness—but 
    "loved the wages of unrighteousness," and received them (Rom. 6:23); by the 
    sword of Israel was Balaam the soothsayer sent to his reward. 
    And now dear A—, there may be nothing in all this that 
    will meet your case. I am sure there will not, unless His hand be in it, 
    whose power steered the bow which was drawn at a venture, causing the arrow 
    to enter just between the joints of the harness. He knows whether you need a 
    wound or a balsam—remember, He wounds in order to heal, and kills that He 
    may make alive. I covet His workings in your soul (as shall seem best to His 
    godly wisdom), to keep you from false peace and false refuges, and to bring 
    you the true light when you seem to sit in darkness and the shadow of death; 
    to give you also knowledge of salvation by the felt remission of your sins, 
    and to guide you into the way of peace. These things are the work of God 
    (John 6:63). But as He condescends to use instrumentality, and that often of 
    the weakest kind, we are encouraged to write and speak to one another, not 
    knowing when or by what word a blessing may be given or received. On this 
    ground, therefore, I would affectionately encourage you, dear A—, to seek 
    for more openness on this dearest of all subjects. You are restrained in 
    speaking and in writing, partly, perhaps, from natural reserve, and partly 
    from the working of the enemy, who well knows how many blessings the saints 
    got, when in simplicity they speak, "often one to another," of their fears 
    and feelings, and of the things which belong to their everlasting peace. He 
    remembers, also, how many of his snares have been broken and his temptations 
    blunted, when fellow-pilgrims have taken sweet counsel together, and spread 
    each other's hard cases before the Lord. Therefore, while he cares not how 
    much lip-talk there is between professors, he will try hard to hinder
    heart-talk, especially between young Christians; he will hold them 
    back with the fear of speaking more than they feel, and professing to be 
    what they are not; and then he will strive to keep them from the helpful 
    encouragements and counsels of those who have tried the road before them, 
    and whose affections yearn over them in the Lord. Think of these things, and 
    the Lord grant that with the heart you may believe, and with the mouth make 
    confession unto salvation, to the glory of His name. 
    Do not wonder if you are assailed with unbelieving or 
    atheistical thoughts, when reading the Scriptures, or at other times. These 
    are all weapons formed from beneath by the master of black arts, and the 
    iron of them has entered into many a redeemed soul, making it to cry out in 
    great bitterness, "If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous 
    do?" Satan knows he cannot destroy them, although he is permitted at times 
    to envelope them in thick mists, making it to appear as if there were no 
    covenant-keeping God, and no Divine authority in the Scriptures, or reality 
    in the religion of Jesus. But he only hurls these fiery darts in order to 
    get the Bible closed, and the footstool of mercy neglected, that the soul 
    may sit down in hopeless gloom, with the eye turned away from the only place 
    of refuge. Though he thus distress, he shall not destroy; and soon the poor 
    heart shall say, as in Micah 7:8, "Rejoice not against me, O my enemy," etc. 
    These painful things are more or less the lot of Zion's pilgrims. But in all 
    these we are more than conquerors through Him that loved us, and He will 
    bruise Satan under the feet of everyone, weak or strong, who put their trust 
    in Him, and who have been caused to fix their hopes upon Jesus, who is 
    entered within the veil. For all such He will arise and rebuke the cruel 
    foe, saying, "Is not this a brand plucked out of the burning?" 
    You asked about the badgers' skins which covered the 
    tabernacle. I am not wise enough to explain that mystic sanctuary, all of 
    which was full of meaning. But, as both the tabernacle and the temple did 
    prefigure Christ and His Church, and as the tabernacle was covered with 
    rams' skins, dyed red, and with badgers' skins, those beasts must 
    necessarily have been slain before these skins could have been so used. 
    Methinks herein beams upon us, as through a lattice, the death of our 
    gracious Savior, who condescended to be slain as a sacrifice for His Church, 
    whom also His righteousness covers. Do we not here see, in these rams' 
    skins, dyed red, the precious blood of our glorious Surety flowing out from 
    His scourged and pierced body with crimson hue, and also a rich covering of 
    spotless and perfect righteousness to justify? Oh, to be under this red 
    covering, "accepted in the Beloved," "complete in Him;" oh, to know the 
    value—feel the efficacy of blood Divine. (Heb. 9:22.) All things in the 
    Heavenly Tabernacle—every living vessel in the upper sanctuary has blood 
    applied by the Holy Spirit. No knowledge, or gifts, or feelings, will do in 
    the place of this—no living vessel is too small to experience it, and none 
    so great as not to need it; you may not yet have felt its powerful 
    application, though you may be in the true sanctuary, under the red 
    covering, which betokens that full atonement has been made. But as the rams' 
    skins were hidden by the badgers' skins (Exod. 24:14), we may learn that 
    there must be personal revelation and application of the atonement, 
    before we can feelingly enjoy the benefit; and for this may you be stirred 
    up to pray. And now I commend you to "Him that is able to keep you from 
    falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of His glory with 
    exceeding joy." And, with best wishes,
    Believe me, yours very sincerely, 
    R. B.